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The Prosecution: Beth

Sometimes I'm recorded while I’m eating. It's jarring to spot myself on her social media – it feels like a sudden shock.

A close companion of a decade, she, labels herself the “creativity monarch”. It’s fun for a short while, but it weighs on our relationship.

Being highly outgoing, there's a constant urge the need to document everything constantly. When we eat out, she says, “The camera eats first,” and snaps pictures with bright lighting, which makes me cringe. I don’t like it when strangers see her posing or filming – I get secondhand embarrassment. Another annoyance is because the food gets cold.

She's not quite an online personality yet, but she is aspiring to become one. She creates vlogs about city life, a day in her life, and her work as a stylist. Her content is good, credit where it's due, but I prefer not to be dragged into it. Sometimes she films me while dining, or simply tagging along. I’ll see myself on her Instagram later, and it pops up like a surprise: I’ll have no makeup on, an awkward face or be captured while eating. It feels invasive.

She also anticipates that I will to record her at inconvenient times. Often I’ll be talking to someone else, or we’ll just be hanging out in the street. The dynamic feels like our friendship has turned into me serving as her unpaid videographer. She could easily employ someone if she wanted professional shots. Upon mentioning my discomfort about this arrangement, she dismissed it. I've been invited to several industry functions, which were appreciated, but that doesn’t make up for all the energy I invest helping her create material.

I’m grateful that Marielle has helped me with my career in design, but I don’t want our connection to become just a ledger of favours. I don't believe she's insincere or inauthentic, but sometimes it seems that if the camera is out, we will begin acting in a way that makes us look good for her vlog.

Her directive is, “OK, look happy!” and film me laughing with another. It feels forced. I need her to recognize that our decade-long friendship still has boundaries. I enjoy being with her, but I also want to enjoy it without being recorded, edited, or posted for an audience. I am not a accessory for her Instagram.

The Defence: The Content Creator's View

I want Beth to see that the content we make together can get us a foot in the door.

I am passionate about shooting content. It's more than a hobby; it’s part of who I am. Producing content and sharing my life online allows me to express myself and engage with people in novel forms.

I don’t see myself as a professional creator yet, but it’s smart to generate income from your interests. I admire people on TikTok who pull off that style of informal, self-made content creation.

Creating content is my version of living actively: noticing the nuances, posting them with an viewership that appreciates the art behind it. I never intend to make Beth uncomfortable. Bringing her to professional gatherings was my method of offering access, giving her a chance to experience behind-the-scenes moments that could help her career in design too. That isn't blackmail, it’s just being pragmatic.

I’d still take her to such functions even if she didn’t help me, but I want her to see what the work we make together can get us: a foot in the door. I know not all people enjoys being on camera, but often spontaneity is what makes content genuine. Being recorded from time to time is an inherent aspect of being my friend. I'd remove anything she asked, but she hasn't made such a request yet.

I don’t expect anybody to be my personal filmmaker, but companions support one another in minor capacities. I thought filming a clip here or there would be enjoyable for Beth. Innovation flourishes in partnership, and having my friend around makes projects lively and enjoyable. I don't compel her to participate in anything, and I’d never deliberately embarrass her. But creating content jointly occasionally is part of how I document our time together.

I cherish our friendship profoundly and want to avoid content creation to drive a wedge between us. I am ready to compromise: like asking before filming, and avoiding shots that might make her self-conscious.

This is not about power, it’s about expressing my perspective while still respecting hers. Clearly making content is not a replacement for real connection: it’s just part of how I live my life and I want her to be included in a way that’s enjoyable for both of us.

Outside Perspectives: Public Sentiment

Should Marielle stop filming herself and Beth when they are socializing?

Nothing is more uncomfortable than having a companion film you. I get that it’s Marielle’s passion, but I wouldn't ask friends come to my workplace. Perhaps she can find like-minded creators to create content with. With the uncertain future of technology, human connections are the only thing we have – don’t waste them!
A respondent, 25

If you’re doing something professionally, you can’t ask your friends for assistance every time, even if they have done it before. While she enjoys creating, that doesn’t mean all those around her is content. She needs to honor her friend's privacy.
Ankit, 26

She may enjoy producing videos and displaying her life online, but it’s not for everyone. It was kind she has helped her friend professionally, but she must to hear what her friend desires.
A commenter, 27

It sounds like you value each other, so cling to that and ensure it’s the priority in your friendship. Foster some authentic memories, where genuine feelings are preserved, not online archives. In fact, public figures who seem to share their worlds actually have more privacy than it seems.
One opinion, 53

Marielle appears to be not fully engaged nor genuine when she’s with Beth – she’s working. Each appears confused as to where the line is. The solution lies not in trying to alter one another, but in each setting defined boundaries around what is comfortable to them and determining if there is an acceptable middle ground.
A final view, 71

Now You Be the Judge

Consider this question: is Marielle exploiting their bond?